The Writer's Poke

The cookies that make you want to take a pregnancy test. Mmmm.... fetus-flavored. My favorite! http://hogmalion.com/shop.cfm?Action=Det&ID=54

It would be too easy for me to make a joke about this story, and I promise I won't say something like: "Why weren't cell phones invented when I went to high school" or "These girls were just trying to show their school spirit." As far as I can tell, though, nobody was pointing a guns to the girls' heads. That is, if they decided to take nude pictures of themselves, that's their business. And who hasn't taken nude pictures of themselves? Not me. But the real interesting thing about the story is that the lawyer admits that the girls made an "error," but surely that's enough, right? Just admit you've made the error, and then you shouldn't have to face punishment. Isn't that how our society works these days?

This isn't one of those fake Internet signs; this is a real sign that I saw while on a business trip in northern Minnesota a couple of months ago. And it reminds me of a conversation I overheard in the cafeteria when I was in high school -- must have been 10th or 11th grade. Gabe and a couple of other guys at the next table over we're talking about what losers kids that still masturbated were. I don't remember the exact conversation, but to paraphrase, it went something like: "When I was a kid, I masturbated like a kid; when I became a man, I put my penis away." It's not that the guys thought masturbation was sinful; it's just that if you didn't have a girlfriend to handle your affairs, so to speak, then you were just a wanker.

This photo, taken at the conclusion of the third McCain/Obama debate, screams for a caption contest. Pundits have noted that McCain was a lot more animated in the last debate, but perhaps that's not always a good thing. Anyway, if you were to put a caption to this photo, what would it say? Here's my lame attempt --> McCain: the Original White Zombie Or how about --> Here McCain attempts to solitify his conservative zombie base. Now I just know you can come up with something better than that!

At least twenty-three people in Indonesia gave up their lives for the equivalent of $4.25. Can anyone in the U.S. really understand how the rest of the world lives? http://www.kansascity.com/451/story/797263.html

Unlike some of the crap I post on this blog, this is apparently a legitimate story. According to BBC News, in 2005 the Cambodian government allowed 42 midgets to fight a lion. The President of the Cambodian Midget Fighting League ( CMFL ) thought that his midgets could beat anyone or anything. After 12 minutes, 28 midgets were dead, and the rest were severely injured . Boy, I'm glad we live in the 21st century. Click the link for the full (true) story: http://www.fmft.net/archives/BBC_NEWS.htm

I love my wife. She just asked to squeeze my hand.

I love the Dwight K. Schrute character from The Office , and I loved Xena so much that a named a cat after her (high praise from me, as it saved Octavia from being named Xena). But why, for the love of all that's holy, did Rainn Wilson pose for a photo as Xena?? It's just plain wrong, and I will never be able to erase the image from my brain. Now neither will you. http://www.joeydevilla.com/