The Writer's Poke

Here's another book that I don't have time to read. :) How well do you keep a diary? I kept one for a couple of years, actually. 1993-1994. And since then, I'll take a stab at an entry every once in a great while. To a certain extent, this blog has taken the place of my diary, but after getting Michael's diary in the mail yesterday -- 600 pages for the 10 year period -- I'm feeling a bit inspired. It's time to dust off the notebook and start putting pen to paper once more!

There's a lot to see and do in most places, but when you live in a place, it loses it's ability to be "exotic." Often times, if the choice is: should we go out exploring, or should we stay home and sit on the couch, the couch wins. As part of our Dubuque trip last weekend, and it took us hours to decide to actually go through with going to Dubuque, we decided to stop at Niagara Cave. http://www.niagaracave.com/default.asp Some say this is one of the top caves in the country, and it well might be. But, even so, it's just 40 miles from home, and it took us 15 months to make the drive there. (slow car) Let me rephrase that: Just forty miles, but 15 months to commit to going there. Am I glad we went? Of course, because now I have a weekend full of memories that I wouldn't have had sitting on the couch at home. And generally speaking, I love to travel. So why was it such a struggle to decide to go?

Question: What is between Rochester, Minnesota and Dubuque, Iowa? Answer: About 180 miles of corn fields and little else. My wife and I made the journey to Dubuque last weekend to see Kip Winger in concert. If any of you recognize the name, you're probably about my age. Winger was a hair metal band that was popular for about three years (1988-1991). Not coincidentally, those were the years I was in high school, the time when my musical tastes formed. Kip, now 46, is more than a hair metal memory, and when he plays live without the band, he plays an acoustic 12-string guitar. The guy can really play. Anyway, Dubuque was having a free concert series, and Kip was the headlining act. I'd say about 250 people were there, but 220 were there just to drink, smoke, and socialize. Less than 30 of us were there for the music. Quite sad, really. http://www.myspace.com/kipwingermusic

For Writers: My mother and her five siblings were raised in the Latter-day Saints religion. All told, I probably have about twenty-five cousins or so, and most of them have a few kids of their own. How many of my mother’s siblings, my cousins, or their children have left the faith of their parents? As far as I know, none of them have. In the “Up” documentary series, researchers follow the lives of British children from diverse backgrounds. This series started in 1964, and every seven years, the researchers come back to interview the participants. This series uses a motto based on a Jesuit saying, “Give me a child until he is seven, and I will show you the man.” Not surprisingly, there’s a lot of truth to that saying. Without getting into the whole “nature vs. nurture” debate, why is it so difficult for people to examine the values they were taught in childhood? Not to pick on the LDS faith, but why have none of my immediate family members found a different religion? What would ...

Give it up for the Old Man. Anyone up for a road trip to Key West??

Linda and I have at least one friend that went to the bookstore at 12:01 a.m. this morning to buy her copy of the last Harry Potter book. And, I'm sure there are tens of thousands of people that did the same, giving up sleep tonight to feed their Potter need. Me, I'm a bit behind. Just finished the third book tonight, and I fear that by the time I get to book 7, the secret of who dies at the end will have been revealed. I'm going to do my best not to find out, but since it will probably take me another couple of months to finish the next four books, it seems unlikely that I'll be able to avoid finding out. My guess is that Snape and Voldemort will be the two that die... surely not Harry or Ron or Hermione?? That would be too sad...

For Writers: Chris was a forty year old professional who pushed himself to perform to the best of his abilities at all times. He almost never allowed anyone inside, but from what people could see on the surface, everyone respected his passion and drive. They also considered him to be a loving family man with a caring wife and a well-mannered little boy. Then one day he was traveling for his job and received a phone call from his wife. What she told him in that conversation made him cancel one of the most important work-related events of his life to immediately catch the next flight home. The matter was apparently that serious. Outside of Chris and his wife, no one knows the why behind what happened once he arrived home. With his small son sleeping in the adjacent bedroom, Chris strangled his wife with an electrical cord, leaving her lifeless corpse to rot. The following morning, he put a bag over his son’s head, removing the last breath from his small body. A little bit later, Chris wo...

Based on this video, I'd say Obama has the women's vote locked up. :)

A special happy birthday to one of my favorite writers, Ms. Octavia Butler (god rest her soul).

For Writers: She and her kid sister took a road trip to Ohio one summer to catch three Def Leppard shows. This was 1987, and the band was at the height of its popularity. The kid sister was 16, and she was willing to do anything to meet the band. By the third show, the roadies had taken notice of the two young women, and one offered the girls backstage passes. When they went backstage after the show, the band was nowhere to be found, but the room was filled with assorted roadies and hopeful groupies. “Take your tops off,” one roadie said, “and you’ll get to meet the band.” This was the initiation price all prospective groupies had to pay for the chance to meet the heavy metal heartthrobs. The 16 year old was willing to strip down, as were most of the girls in the room. The older sister refused to take her top off, however, as the thought of a bunch of 40 year old roadies pawing at her chest repulsed her. In the end, the roadies failed to keep their end of the deal, selecting only the ...

For Writers: I hadn’t seen or heard from her in over three years, and then one summer, she sent me a letter. The reasons for us losing touch are too complicated to note here, and may not matter anyway. In short: she had graduated from college and moved on with her life. Her letter was handwritten, which is a nice touch in the age of word processors and emails, and she briefly filled in the gaps of my knowledge. She was preparing to adjunct at a local college, and her wedding was set for that December. Interestingly enough, I was beginning my teaching career as an adjunct at the same college that fall. Seeing her a few weeks later at the teacher orientation session, I noticed that she hadn’t changed that much. On the surface, her look was more professional than it had been as a student, but otherwise, I found it difficult to acknowledge the passing of three years. And though we were friendly to one another that semester, we were by no means close friends. When she wasn’t teaching, she w...

We put the crib together yesterday, and guess who has already made herself at home? Our white fur ball. (Click on the picture for a bigger look)

For Writers: When I graduated from college, it was a hot August day in Illinois . The gym didn’t have air conditioning, and my silk shirt was completely soaked after the first ten minutes. The ceremony lasted for over two hours, and then I went out to eat spaghetti with a couple of friends. Yawn. Graduating is one of those events that people would instinctively put on a personal highlight reel. But at least in my case, the event – the ritual – was an uncomfortable and mundane experience. Symbolically, it represented three years of my life, but it’s hard to capture three years by walking across the stage, shaking a few hands, and having a few pictures taken of you. In life, we often try to capture the culmination of experience through ritual – whether it be a baptism, a wedding, or a graduation. Human beings need rituals, but are ritualized events really the highlights of our lives? Today, consider your own personal highlight reel. What would you include on it? Would rituali...

For Writers: It’s a hip thing to do, to get a tattoo. The idea of joining the inked masses has crossed my mind on a number of occasions, but at this point I’m still ink free. The main reason for that: I haven’t found anything so soaked full of meaning that I wanted to leave an indelible mark on my body with it. Over the past decade, however, many people have started getting tattooed as a kind of fashion accessory. Statistics indicate that over one-third of people in the 18-29 age range now have at least one tattoo. Why? One of the main reasons given is to feel “sexier.” The non-tattooed majority still hold prejudicial thoughts against folks with tattoos, though, with opinion polls indicating that those without tattoos find those with tattoos to be less intelligent, less sexy, and overall, less attractive. Nevertheless, fully one-third of the 100 sexiest women, as determined by FHM magazine, have tattoos. At the moment, tribal tattoos are the most en vogue, followed by crosses, ...

For Writers: When my wife and I visited Hawaii for the first time a few years ago, we both thought that this might be the place. Stepping out of the airport, the first thing to greet us was a rainbow, and the temperature stayed at a constant 80 degrees for our entire visit. I have an aunt that claims it takes an artist’s eye to see the many variations in the shades of green in nature, but then she’s never been to Hawaii . Hundreds of shades of green were growing everywhere. Paradise is easier to imagine than to experience, just as anticipation often times trumps attainment. I would assume that it is hard-wired into each of us to be difficult to please, but how can a place like Hawaii start to get old after just a few days? But it did, and we were ready to go home. Home might not be paradise, but the paradox is, it doesn’t need to be. What is your idea of paradise? Try to describe it in physical terms. Is it a place you’d want to live, or is it a place just best to visit? C...

For Writers: People are busy, and acknowledging that fact, I hate asking anyone for favors that will eat away their precious time. As I know from personal experience, writing a reference letter can be a chore, and needless to say, the person doing the requesting always needs it written and sent out immediately. The sense of urgency is probably a good thing, though, because if given an ample amount of time – two or three weeks would certainly seem helpful – it would just be far too easy for the reference writer to procrastinate and forget. When I first started asking people for references, usually professors to support my applications to graduate schools, I would often write the letters myself. Sometimes my professors would look at me like I was crazy to hand them a completed reference letter that I had written for them to sign; but I’m sure that some of them simply signed their names at the bottom, secretly glad that they didn’t have to take the time to write anything themselves. What ...

For Writers: Over the years, I’ve been asked to write reference letters for a number of students and faculty. The secret to writing a good reference letter is to add specific key words that pop off the page. To help them “pop,” I think it’s even okay to put such words in bold – words such as innovative or leader . No one really reads references with the intent of savoring every word. After all, the reference letter has a certain form and follows specific, mutually-agreed upon criteria. Actually, most readers of reference letters are simply looking for what you don’t say. Death by omission. I’ve found that the hardest references to write are the ones for people I don’t know that well. A surprising number of students ask instructors for a reference letter after just a semester (and sometimes not even that long). And, as a direct supervisor of faculty, I sometimes need to write a reference letter for someone that I haven’t observed teach. How can I tell someone that Dr. X is a good teache...

For Writers: My friend Patrick called me up and asked me to jump out of an airplane with him. He and two other friends had decided it would be fun to hurdle toward the ground at great speed, and they wanted to include me in the fun. I asked him where they planned to go to do the jumping, and he named a local parachute club. Although his offer was tempting, I begged poverty as an excuse. I simply didn’t have the extra money to join them, I said. While it was true that I didn’t have the money, any fear I might have of jumping out of an airplane I kept to myself. None of them plummeted to their deaths that day, and all of them came back telling heroic stories of daring. Once they had returned safely, I felt bad not going. The experience had bonded them in such a way that I would forever be excluded from the “Three Flying Musketeers.” I promised to jump with them the next time they went, but they never jumped again. My opportunity to become the fourth Musketeer never came. Today, make a li...

For Writers: We all have those “what should I do?” moments in our lives. When I have one, I like to consider all of my options in minute detail. Sometimes I become so overwhelmed in looking at the pros and cons of each option that I find it impossible to decide what to do. For weeks I might go over the options again and again in my mind, only to find that the problem has resolved itself over time. Either the options that I once had are no longer options, or the problem has changed so much that I have to start the thinking process of “what should I do?” all over again. I often find myself feeling guilty for having a mind. Why can’t I be more impulsive? Why can’t I act and live life without so much planning? Isn’t it worse being a prisoner, locked behind my own personal mind field? Write about a time in your life that required you to make an important decision. What emotions did you feel as you thought about what you needed to do? Were you able to act and make the decision, or did you le...

For Writers: Hanging on the wall over my computer desk is a print of Edvard Munch’s “The Scream.” The emotions Munch captures in that simple painting often match the way I feel when I sit down at the computer to write. If I’m not feeling any creative juices flowing in my veins, I want nothing more than to go to the nearest bridge and scream. Sometimes screaming actually helps. It releases tension and bad energy, offering writers the chance to purge the emotions that keep them from producing quality work. While a certain level of stress might be necessary to write, feeling too much stress cripples writers into becoming non-writers. True writers know they were born to write. Screaming has the ability to unlock the creative energy necessary to write, to tell the story that needs to be told. Writers were born to scream. Today, think about what story you’re dying to scream to the world. What has kept you from telling that story? Have you tried to tell it before, but somehow refused to infus...