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Showing posts from May 18, 2008

Devils -- Invitation to Write #65

For Writers: My wife has played with Ouija boards and she has little doubt that they work. While in junior high, she had a bunch of her girlfriends over for a slumber party, and they decided it would be great fun to make their own Ouija board. Apparently someone from the other side answered, and it knew things about the girls, spooky things, that none of the girls knew individually about each other. Eventually, the spirit identified itself as a demon, and loud crashing footsteps ran up and down the stairs right outside her room. All the girls took their fingers off the board in fright, except my wife. She pulled and pulled, but it took all her effort to get her finger off the simple cardboard dial. What was holding it there? They took the Ouija outside to an empty field to burn it, but even though there was no wind, all of their matches burned out immediately upon being lit. And when they finally did light the board, it wouldn't burn. I have to admit I'm pretty skeptical, pr...

A Boy Named Ramon -- Invitation to Write #64

For Writers: My mom decided it would be fun to stick me with the middle name "Ramon." First, nobody pronounces it correctly, as they usually say "Ray-mund." Or, some have fun with the latin implications by heavily twirling the Spanish "r" and saying "Ruhhh-MOAN." According to my mom, however, the name is simply pronounced "Ruh-mon." You might have noticed that most people have absolutely no say in what they are named. That honor usually goes to your parents, which means most children this year will be named either Jacob or Emily. And we don't even have control over our nicknames. I knew a guy in college that we stuck with the name "Slick," and pretty quickly, he ceased to be "Travis" altogether. If you're female you can marry into a name as well. One guy in Texas actually did take his wife's last name recently, but it required a court battle for him to do so. Of course my wife always thought that it would...

Pissed through the Years

Bret's disclaimer for sensitive readers: contains language, but read it anyway. It's really funny! (source: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Pissed ) On a spectrum of emotions, love and hate are the two extremes. Pissed is somewhere beyond hate. Famous Incidences Throughout history, there have been many historical events which were influenced or directly caused by being pissed, some good, some bad. Below are a few: 4000 BC - God creates the Earth. makes a guy and girl. the girl ate the forbidden fruit. God is pissed. 3900 BC - Cain is pissed at Abel. Cain kills him and God and Adam are seriously pissed 3800 BC - God is pissed at everyone but Noah. Everybody and dinosaurs are pissed when they got drowned. 3200 BC - Egyptians treats Jews as slaves. God is pissed and sents Moses. AT the same year, Pharaoh's son dies, and is pissed. Pharaoh goes after Moses in Red Sea, but dies. He is pissed. ...

The Weight of Memory -- Invitation to Write #63

For Writers: For those of us that have trouble remembering where we left our car keys, it might seem like a blessing, but for Jill Price, remembering is a curse. Price is the only documented case of " hyperthymestic syndrome" and she lives with every single memory as though it is still happening. Her husband died a few years ago, but in her mind, he dies with her daily. Most of us keep journals so that we can remember, but why does Price feel compelled to write down memories that she knows she will never lose? Perhaps just to prove to others that she's not making up the things she claims to remember? Or to prove to herself that she's not insane? How much do memories weigh? What is the one thing you never want to forget? What is one memory that continues to weigh you down? "The past is never dead, it is not even past." -- William Faulkner http://www.amazon.com/Woman-Cant-Forget-Extraordinary-Science/dp/1416561765/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books& qid...

Senator Mike Gravel and the Obama Girl

The candidates who have no chance in hell of actually winning are the most fun to follow. Remember former Alaska Seneator Mike Gravel? Of course not. He was one of the "also rans" for the Democratic nomination. Anyway, he's now apparently joined the Libertarian Party so that he can keep running, but it looks like former Republican and former Georgia congressman Bob Barr has the Libertarian nomination wrapped up. What Bob Barr doesn't have, though, is a video with the Obama Girl! Watch it. Yes, it's painful, but doesn't it make you wish Gravel could win now??