The movie starts with a montage sequence, with both Charlie (Adam Driver) and Nicolle (Scarlett Johansson) telling what they like and appreciate about each other. This seems really cute, until it becomes obvious that there must be a reason that they are saying nice things about one another, and then the film cuts to the couple sitting in a room with a therapist (Robert Smigel). In other words, this was all just an exercise assigned to them by their marriage counselor, with the expressed purpose of reminding them that, at least once upon a time, they liked -- maybe even loved -- one another. And maybe they still do, because all of the stuff they mention is nice, and it remains to be seen why they are at a marriage counselor, or what secrets they're hiding that they didn't want to write down on notebook paper at the shrink's request.
Wrong. They aren't at a marriage counselor at all. They are at a mediator, preparing for a separation and amicable(?) divorce. They've written down all these nice things, but Nicolle decides that she doesn't want to read it out loud, and so neither of them hear what the other has said. Only the viewers get to know what they apparently really think about one another.
And so... what went wrong in the marriage? They have an eight-year-old son that they both love, and we guess that their marriage has gone about ten years. If they have a problem with their marriage, it's that they cannot communicate what's been communicated in the opening montage, and they leave a lot of other things unsaid. Both are selfish and easily hurt. And when the film begins, Nicolle has simply decided that she no longer wants to be married. Maybe Charlie feels the same way, but the burden of what's happening to them (e.g. the painful process of divorce) seems to be Nicolle's doing.
What does she want? She wants to be more than a mom and "second" to Charlie. She's from L.A. and feels like she's given up her identity and career to play second-fiddle to Charlie in New York. It's obvious that she's not as happy being in New York as Charlie is. He's driven and probably blind to her needs. He's the director, and he's "directed" everything about their marriage to suit his needs and preferences.
I wouldn't call this film a comedy, although it probably is meant to be -- because so much of it is awkward and lowkey funny. At first, I hate Nicolle's character and find myself siding with Charlie, but Charlie is equally annoying and hard to like. One wishes that the divorce didn't have to happen, because, yes, they probably do still love each other "even if it no longer makes sense," but what exactly does that mean? Could they really not find a way to stay married, both pursue the things they wanted to do with their careers, and avoid such a seemingly avoidable yearlong trauma?
Noah Baumbach is a great writer and an equally good director. And the film has a great supporting cast -- Alan Alda, Ray Liotta, Wallace Shawn, etc. I appreciate how the scenes are laid out and how some of them develop fortwo, three, four or more minutes without a cut. It's very smartly done.
In terms of plot, you wonder if they will somehow end up not getting divorced, if this will be something they "figure out" before the divorce goes through, but this film is too sophisticated for that. What I like is that eventually Charlie will get to hear Nicolle's accolades about him. And in the final scene, the true healing process has begun. Charlie and Nicolle are no longer married, but they've both grown up and matured, and they understand each other a lot better. They will still be able to raise their son together. They have found a way to maintain a relationship, albeit a coparenting/friendship in place of a marriage.
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